literature

Silence

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BlakeSanger26's avatar
Published:
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Literature Text

There are times when I want to let the world my TRUE self.
Which is my full rage.
I want to let everyone know I am not always kind.
I am not generous.
I am not a "goody-goody" person.

And it is not just about my fury and rage.

It is my emotions and feelings that I want all to be pouring out of me before I explode!

There are times when I want to be screaming right out of my lungs as I wake up.
Maybe for someone to hear me out.
That could be a sign for something.

When I'm in love, I'll let that person know how much I love them and I'll even make sure they'll be the only one who deserve my love and who I should only be loving and I shouldn't be in love with all these other fakers and players.

When I am happy, I want to let everyone around me should be feeling happy about themselves and let everyone else get along but that could be a dream.

But when it comes to anger...
I'm not sure if it is safe to tell.

When my family gets me mad, I want to runaway and never come back.
I want to let them know for sure that they are a screw up and I shouldn't be feeling this pain when we can't even have a single family moment which is never.

When my friends get me mad, I just want to get out of that group of friends and remind them what friendship means when things get complicated and when things aren't the same as it used to be.

And to everyone else, get the hell out of my way when I'm raising hell on earth.

But of course I do have feelings for everybody.
I don't want people feeling hurt, I am too sensitive for others to feel hurt at all.
I choose not to let my feeling out.
I choose the positive emotions out towards everybody around me.
I choose not to put anger on my family is because they're the only family I got.
I choose not to get angry at my friends is when I didn't have anyone at all, they were there when I need to be saved from suicide.
And to everybody else, I sense that everyone deserve to have someone to care for them.

When I am feeling any emotion at all, I rethink over and over on what to feel at that very moment when there's nothing but silence to help me on what to choose to express myself.
well this is the best I got.
don't judge me, and sorry if I didnt make any sense at all.
© 2012 - 2024 BlakeSanger26
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Sweet-Felt-Sorrow's avatar
I can understand this word for word..